Tag: Horror

Movie Review: The Whole Damn Paranormal Activity Franchise

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IMDB, Paranormal ActivityIMDB, Paranormal Activity 2IMDB, Paranormal Activity 3IMDB, Paranormal Activity 4
Paranormal Activity on IMDB (Horror, 86 Minutes, 2007)
Paranormal Activity 2 on IMDB (Horror, 91 Minutes, 2010)
Paranormal Activity 3 on IMDB (Horror, 83 Minutes, 2011)
Paranormal Activity 4 on IMDB (Horror, 88 Minutes, 2012)

I, like everybody else, heard amazing things about this series.  The first movie was made on the thinnest of shoestring budgets (less than $15,000) but has since grossed over 100 million.  I had never gotten around to watching it.  With a fifth movie announced, four in the can and a whole day to kill I figured, “why not a marathon?”

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Movie Review: Silent Hill Revelation

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IMDB, Silent Hill Revelation“Silent Hill: Revelation” on IMDB

Horror, 94 Minutes, 2012

This is a sequel to 2006’s underappreciated “Silent Hill” [IMDB].  Where the original movie was more inspired by the video game this movie attempts to merge that mostly original story with the third game.  (The “Silent Hill” video game series tends to vacillate between a loosely contiguous plotline and stand-alone stories set in its universe.  The third game was essentially a direct sequel to the first.  For what it’s worth the second game, which connects to very little, was the best game in the series and one of the best games ever made.)

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Movie Review: Hunting Grounds

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IMDB, Hunting Grounds“Hunting Grounds” on IMDB

You know how much fun it is listen to drunk people mumble gibberish for hours?  When they get quiet all of a sudden, stare at you with a bleary, squinty eye and demand to know if you’re paying attention?  Maybe they’ll reach out to give you a friendly pat on the shoulder but, upon missing by an arm-length, slip off their chair and bloody their chin.  Now, spit and blood smeared across their puffy face, they accuse you of being rude just before adding vomit to the mix.

That experience pretty much sums up this movie.

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Movie Review: Attack of the Herbals

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IMDB, Attack of the Herbals“Attack of the Herbals” on IMDB

Horror, 81 Minutes, 2011

Oh those wacky Nazis; what are they up to now?!  Whatever it is you know it has to be both totally evil and totally awesome.  Are they cross-breeding sharks and alligators?  Are they building a killer bees machine gun?  Maybe they’re constructing a secret underground empire where they’re breed an army of genetically enhanced cybernetic gorillas!

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Movie Review: Cabin in the Woods

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IMDB, Cabin in the Woods“Cabin in the Woods” on IMDB

Horror,  95 Minutes, 2011

Clever movies are more fun.  It’s not that movies have to be clever to be fun or that clever movies are always fun – but take any regular dumb movie and make it clever and you have more fun.  For example take the plot where a bunch of friends drive up to a ridiculously remote cabin that they’ve never been before and then get picked off in ones and twos by zombies, cannibals, demons, ghosts, rednecks, rabid weasels or what-have-you.  That’s not a clever plot.  That’s a clichéd, hackneyed, dime-a-dozen plot.  “Cabin in the Woods” takes that tired plot and makes it clever.

“Cabin in the Woods” is insanely fun.

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Movie Review: Infestation

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“Infestation” on IMDB

Horror, 91 Minutes, 2009

I really adore classically staged monster movies.  The kind where everyday people have to deal with giant things – worms, bugs, crocodiles, lemurs, etc.  Whatever they are, they’re big and they’re nasty.  Classics like “Tremors” [IMDB] or “Eight-legged Freaks” [IMDB] are just plain fun.  The scares tend to be more of the shock than gore variety (although there’s a little of that as well) and generally things are more family friendly.

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