Thriller/Horror, 94 Minutes, 2015
As unlikely as it may seem, somebody gave M. Night Shyamalan [IMDB] money to make another movie. His last offering, 2013’s After Earth [My Review] is a truly pathetic sci-fi film. Prior to that, he proved his inability to do fantasy with The Last Airbender [IMDB]. What’s a Shyamalan to do?
Scuttle back to thrillers as quickly as possible, apparently.
Horror/Drama, 93 Minutes, 2014
Found-footage is a genre that just won’t die. The well is fouled and rank, but Directors keep dipping in, audiences keep lapping it up and, yes, I keep reviewing them. Gimmicks distract, even when used well, and this is one gimmick that’s run it’s course. It does nothing positive for this movie. We get video from handheld cams, helmet cams, body cams and, like all found-footage, impossible cams.
Horror/Thirller, 89 Minutes, 2014
This is one of the new breed of hybrid found-footage movies. In the past filmmakers invented all new classes of mental gymnastics to explain why somebody would continue filming while a monster gnawed away at their ankle. Here, as in other recent offerings, “found” footage is intermixed with traditional cinematography to provide flavor without tying the whole production down.
Horror, 77 Minutes, 2013
I’m a skeptic. In a general sense, yes, but also in the organized one. This movie is about Bigfoot, something for which the ridiculously poor evidence can’t even begin to defend as “a thing”. Sure, it’s kind of fun and kind of harmless, but it’s also annoying as hell to hear about the same old, debunked, evidence again and again. It’s also a found-footage movie and, damn, aren’t they getting old?
Science-Fiction/Thiller, 90 Minutes, 2013
If you liked “Gravity” (my review) then you’re a smart, discerning and, if I may say, strikingly attractive individual. You’ll also love “Europa Report”. The movie presents a highly realistic space mission; in this case a multi-year, multi-national mission to Europa, Jupiter’s sixth moon. All our (actual) evidence indicates that Europa is home to massive, warm water-oceans under its geologically active crust of ice. It’s generally understood to be our best legitimate shot of finding extraterrestrial life in the solar system.
Horror, 87 Minutes, 2012
15 years ago a mass grave of over 30 people is found in the Siberian wilderness. The Russian government ignores the event and provides no explanation. A small group of journalists accompany a powerful psychic to the site to investigation. After making contact with spirits at the site the group is led to an abandoned research station several miles away. There they unravel a terrible secret while being assaulted by… something, left in the ruins.
“The Frankenstein Theory” on IMDB
Horror, 87 Minutes, 2013
[This is the twentieth selection in my irregular, “My Wife and Kids are Visiting Relatives and I’m Home Watching Movies” film festival.]
I, like everybody else, heard amazing things about this series. The first movie was made on the thinnest of shoestring budgets (less than $15,000) but has since grossed over 100 million. I had never gotten around to watching it. With a fifth movie announced, four in the can and a whole day to kill I figured, “why not a marathon?”
Drama/Comedy, 97 Minutes, 2001
As my hordes of imaginary regular readers know I watch a lot of bad monster movies. So many, in fact, that when an actual good monster movie sneaks in I sometimes have to consider: is it truly a good movie or have I abused my pallette to the point where even mediocre seems good by comparison? Can a dog that eats cat-turds truly appreciate filet mignon?
“Willow Creek” on IMDB 
