Horror, 85 Minutes, 2010
Kids hiking through Europe are going missing near a small village in Poland and a junior reporter thinks there’s a story. Her editor demads she report on Honey Bee colony collapse (because editors will always shift resources away from young missing Americans abroad to cover science stories). Following her gut and ignoring orders she convinces her ex-boyfriend photographer and an intern to go AWOL and investigate the disappearances.
Horror/Comedy, 100 Minutes, 2013
Vampires are what we used to have before zombies. They pretty much all migrated to TV and terrible tween books, but a few years ago they were some kind of hot shit.
In this we meet Wayne Gretzky (no relation, and the first of several running jokes that goes absolutely nowhere), an ancient vampire who accidentally killed his mortal love 300 years earlier. Since then he’s been vampire-impotent and unable to “grow his teeth”. He now works as a history professor, survives on animal blood, and is generally pretty content.
“Blood: The Last Vampire” on IMDB
Action/Horror, 91 Minutes, 2009
This should have been my kind of movie. A hot Japanese, 400-year old, half-demon school-girl hunting evil demons with a sword in the age of disco – how could it go wrong? Apparently in a quite a few ways, although I did enjoy it overall.
Zombie alert!
See the review of “World War Z” on our sister site, MoreBrains.com dedicated to all things zombie!
Action/Horror, 91 Minutes, 2010
The tagline for this one is “You Think You Know Vampires? Think Again.” I’m not sure if that’s a dig at sparkly vampires or not but these vampires, here? Pretty damn average if you ask me.
Horror, 90 Minutes, 2012
This isn’t a good movie. In fact it’s a bad movie. Bad movie! Bad movie! (Like most of the movies in the class it has an identity crisis. It’s listed on IMBD as “Demon Hunter” but the available poster calls it “Obsidian Hearts”.)
[This is the twenty-first through twenty-ninth selection in my irregular, “My Wife and Kids are Visiting Relatives and I’m Home Watching Movies” film festival. Yes, I watched all of these. In a row. In a day. More than 13 hours. Do you people see the lengths to which I will go to prevent myself from making an actual contribution to society?]
I was 16 years-old in 1987 when the first “Hellraiser” movie came out. Back then the only thing approaching what we now know as “the Internet” existing solely in the minds of schizophrenics so I was forced to wait for the VHS release of the movie to see it. I had just recently gotten into horror in a big way based on the recommendations of a friend and was a fan of Clive Barker [Wikipedia]. The movie, written and directed by Barker and based on his novella, “The Hellbound Heart” [Wikipedia], was twisted, gruesome and most importantly, different.
“The Frankenstein Theory” on IMDB
Horror, 87 Minutes, 2013
[This is the twentieth selection in my irregular, “My Wife and Kids are Visiting Relatives and I’m Home Watching Movies” film festival.]
Horror, 87 Minutes, 2012
[This is the eighteenth selection in my irregular, “My Wife and Kids are Visiting Relatives and I’m Home Watching Movies” film festival.]
Sci-fi/Horror, 98 Minutes, 2011
[This is the seventeenth selection in my irregular, “My Wife and Kids are Visiting Relatives and I’m Home Watching Movies” film festival.]
